State-administered death is always a greater horror than any other by virtue of the methodical reasoning that precedes it. French philosopher Albert Camus wrote that "capital punishment is the most premeditated of murders". "The United States' concept of justifiable homicide/Executions in criminal law stands on the dividing line between an excuse, justification and an exculpation. In other words, it takes a case that would otherwise have been a murder or another crime representing intentional killing, and either excuses or justifies the individual accused from all criminal liability or treats the accused differently from other intentional killers.

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Carlton A. Turner

Texas Execution on July 10th 2008

TEXAS scheduled Carlton A. Turner's Death on September 27th 2007- Stayed by the US Supreme Court some hours before Texas wanted see his death, for no special reason other than to slow down the South and the busiest Death Machinery ... for respecting reviews by the Highest Court and may have a look into all the claims ... Thank You for that extra time, given now with Carlton, 

Home Guestbook Blog -For a talk and MediaNews
Poetry more Poetry - October 2007 Book:"Nechronomistic" ISBN:  3-937034-93-5  by Carlton A. Turner
Rant's & Raves III After September 27th, 2007 Interview - May 23, 2008 New Book Project: "To Hell - Farewell !"
Rant's & Raves II   ...."knit until death" Texas reflection of Humanity by Jacquielynn Floyd !!! New Execution date set July 10th 2008 
GoldenPeoples.com
Rant's & Raves I In Memory of Carlton A. Turner

Rant's & Raves

Book: Nechronomistic ISBN:  3-937034-93-5  by Carlton A. Turner #999321

 

ARTISTS REFLECT ON THE DEATH PENALTY!! The death penalty art show will be exhibited in Houston at M2 from February 10 - 18, 2007 with an opening night reception at 7 PM on the 10th. The gallery is located at 325 West 19th Street in Houston (Map). There will be a gallery talk Friday, Feb 16, at 7 PM with Mary Mikel Stump, Gallery Director of the JCM gallery at Texas State University. http://www.deathpenaltyartshow.org/

More on: Rant's & Raves II

"Mull Again" - 23rd January, 2007 

" A Chronicle Of Twilight " Jan. 2007

Immediate Resolutions: Part2CAT Jan 24, 2007

Immediate ResolutionsCAT, Tue Jan

Mulligan" Carlton A. Turner 20.December 2006

"Still Hungry" CAT Sun Dec 3, 2006

 "Really? Is That So?" cat Mon Nov 6 

" Contumacious Legacy " CAT Mon Nov 6 

"Food for Thought (Eat This)" 

"Not a Sporting Chance" CAT Sat Oct 21 2006

"My Most Humble Apologies"CAT Sat Oct 21 

"INCEPTION" Cat Sun Oct 8, 2006 

Okay! Okay! I have a question... CAT Mon May 8 

Don't you just Love this Earth? Really! CAT Mon May 8 

I've Lived this Life, so I really can't blame the world .. CAT Fri May 5 

I used to be pretty jealous of Jesus Christ! Yeah! CAT Fri May 5 

Updates...: Rant's & Raves II

Rant's & Raves III After September 27th, 2007

*I am working with Mr. Stephen Woods of www.anarchyinchains.com - Oct. 2006

"Mull Again"

AAAARGH! FINE! In the interest of promoting democrasy within our organisations and in the light of rationalism and responsibility, I hereby pledge NOT to take the "Hunger Strike" too far. I feel that I have made my point and shown dedication. It has taken a lot for me to lay aside my ego/pride and admit that harming myself permanently and tempting Death by my own volition is unnecessary. People, things have gotten bad, that is how intense we feel here. It seems as if anything less than going all the way is not enough.

Today is the 23rd of January, so I'm sure I can hang in there longer just to show solidarity for the last 4 or 5 guys left. However, I will be sure to be careful not to hurt myself further. From this point on, I'm going to try things your way. I will wait and watch to see how many of you are ready to work with me. I hope to accomplish more in Life than Death. If I'm alive and working, then I feel that we have hope.

I apologize to anyone who thought I was foolish enough to kill myself for people who don't care whether I live or not. Many would Love to see me dead. Morbid entertainment. I'm sure the state was looking forward to saving about $90 on chemicals to kill me. People need me alive! I have responsibility to protect my Life. Toughmen die! Only the strong survive!  

 

"Mulligan"

By Carlton A. Turner  

As stated in a previous article of mine, I and several others are initiating another ‘Hunger strike’ and participating in other protest activities starting January 1, 2007. On a personal level a few things have changed. This time I have a goal set on the length of time I plan to protest. My hunger strike is set to last until I am no longer able to function without medical assistance. Other activities are stated to continue until at least a semblance of humanity is attained in our environment and the abolishment of the death penalty is aggressively pursued and legislation pushed proactively towards these means. The intensity of these protests will vary with the tactics completed. That is my chronological goal, but let me explain the good of protesting itself...  

My immediate goal of protesting is to raise the level of awareness and dedication to the abolishment of the death penalty (our cause). This goal applies to individuals on the inside and outside of the Polunsky Unit. I would never go so far as to say that people don’t care or won’t do anything. However, I will say that it is my opinion that we could all do more... far more! This includes me. I do not dismiss the actions of those who have applied time, efforts and finances into our cause, because everyone who has participated in these actions has a level of dedication not to be disrespected and these same people kept our cause alive. Their work is undoubtedly appreciated! Yet evidently it’s going to take more and I’d like to address this with all consideration for what has already been done for our cause.  

One of the few ideas I have to step up the level of dedication is modifying the marches in the near future. Instead of marching the streets and around government buildings with signs and shirts emblazoned with pictures and slogans – is it possible that we march the streets and then INTO government buildings with grievances and petitions to confront our lawmakers and state representatives so that they may see that people are serious about pushing legislature?  It would be even better to attend functions that are relevant to our cause and speak out appropriately, professionally and articulate our cause effectively. Would it also be a more effective use of our funds to eschew the fancy clothes and signs in exchange for open-air television time and highway billboards? Instead of preaching to the choir and telling each other about our cause – could we engage in discourse (conversation/education/debate) with the unconscious people on popular chat rooms on the internet in a non-combatative manner? Another application of our finances is to buy the services of an attorney who believe in our cause and will look out for the best interest of our cause by filing potent legal documents that will effectively bring about positive results. On a funny note: If we are to spend money on some clothes – don’t you think it would be cool to buy some DRIVE Movement dog shirts from the web-site http://drivemovement.org  

And get the dog-lovers involved by having a dog march? At least I think it would be cool! These are just a few peaceful ways to elevate the actions taken in the future. I am an advocate of ALL ACTION. However, I cannot promote any more radical actions due to a misguided investigation of the receipt violent protest activated on the Polunsky Unit which seeks to connect me with the actions of another man. Ridiculous if you ask me!  

I recognize one of the reasons that more aggressive actions cannot be taken and this is the same element that stagnates us here within the Polunsky Unit. That reason is the inability to work together. This speaks more on the state of society’s empathy than anything. Intense action requires a high level of dedication, which in turn provokes the fear of failure. It’s easy to throw away minor failures or do something which has little to no consequences (negative or positive). However, it’s hard to a person’s ego/pride when they have to accept failure or dire consequences, especially when they weren’t in complete control of the situation. Therefore, everybody wants to be the leader to do things their way. Their ego/pride would hate to accept that they aren’t leaders. I believe the saying used to be: “too many chiefs and not enough Indians.” I’d like to see it today as: “too many Indians think they’re chiefs.” A true leader is a very special breed person. There are traits that come with being a leader that are learned and natural. One of these traits is “responsibility”, which means to put other’s needs before your wants. A leaders needs are already seen to, but there’s a difference between “wants” and “needs”. One thing our cause needs is Unity which is an intense action within itself, another trait of leadership is to have problem-solving skills. Lack of unity is a problem! Overcoming ego/pride and the fear of failure is how to solve it. Bravery is another trait which will help overcome the fear of failure (courage). The last trait I’ll mention is charisma. Save the contrarian attitudes and combativeness for our oppressors. A leader works with people despite any shortcomings and doesn’t exploit shortcomings of compatriots to gain power (manipulation). The leader recognizes that the people are the strength/force that equals to power. That makes the people of your cause the most valuable asset you will possess! This brings me to the next issue...  

While I applaud the positive progress that many death penalty abolitionist groups have made, I must state on record that you groups are failing us by under appreciating us.

Now don't get me wrong, because I give all due respect to your pen-pal request skills. It’s on us here at Polunsky Unit to get our pen-pals involved with our cause instead of distracting themselves from our reality and struggle here with romances and gossiping. However, when it’s come to working with us on our cause most of you have fallen flat-splat! Right on the face! My prime example is how the members of the DRIVE Movement reached out to many of you death penalty abolitionist groups to work towards the goals of our cause. All they asked for you all to do is contact someone on the Polunsky Unit that’s active in the protest and work with them on a personal level.

Just to get an idea of you’re fighting for the fellowship behind our cause. Guess what my friends? DRIVE Movement never heard back from most of them. Some of you are using our names and cause as a money-making scheme to profit on a selfish level. This refusal to work with us is proof of that and one of my goals is to find out exactly who you are then expose you! This article is the beginning of that search, because I will have this sent to as many of your groups as I can. Those who don’t post this message in some way, shape or form are immediately suspected! You all have websites and/or newsletters that represent your groups. I will post who I sent this message to on my site so we will all know who got it and it will be self-evident who posts it. This is a step towards the unity of those serious about our cause so that we may work together. The inability to work together confirms to the propaganda that the people here on death row are anti-social (a trait of being sociopath). One of the elements of fighting for our cause is to show that people on death row can be humans with redeeming values. A manifestation of humanity!  

Humanity! This is what we intend to express. Part of our cause is to present the humans on death row to humanity and ask them as humans – are you willing to kill another human? On a grand scale the cause of abolishing the death penalty is a battle in the ongoing war for mankind’s evolution into a civilized society of humans. Once the death penalty issue is truly brought to the “hall of judgement! In the court of society, the outcome of how it’s handled will be a symbol of the level of humanity/civilization our society has achieved. It all comes down to humanity and good (for those who believe in divine intervention). We have been victims of the state for too long! Victims of the state of Texas and/or savage state of mind. The state only offers vengeance. Humanity and god offers justice! So it’s time that we quit calling the people in the Polunsky Unit on death row by the epithets “inmate”, “convict” and/or “prisoner”. We are humans! Humans fighting against an eternity which violates our humanity. One part of being a human is fighting for it. It’s something that Africans had to do to establish the fact that Africans are not just mere property. Back then we had slavery abolitionist and today we have death penalty abolitionists. The purpose of the oppression is to subjugate a human by repression and/or suppression of the nature of humanity and the stripping the identity of an individual. By calling us by these epithets you are inadvertently feeding into the stripping of our identity as humans. This leads other people to accept the violations done to us because they no longer see us as humans.  

Example: Let’s say for instance you opened your morning paper and read this... yesterday afternoon a man named Joe Citizen walked inside a local diner just before closing time and refused to leave the premises in protest of the killing of animals for food. Mr Citizen sat peacefully while officers sprayed “crowd-control chemical agents” directly on his skin. These chemical agents are designed to constrict breathing; induce vomiting and stimulate the burning of fire for several hours. After applying this chemical agent twice in which a whole can of crowd control was sprayed on the lone Mr. Citizen, a team of 5 of the biggest officers in the department – none of which are smaller that 6 feet and 250 pounds – were suited up in pads and gas masks. They immediately ran inside the diner with a hard plexiglass shield and slammed into Mr. Citizen. As Mr. Citizen was wrestled to the ground, he was punched and kicked several times. After handcuffing Mr. Citizen and securing his feet with ankle chains the officer then proceeded to cut off all of his clothing until Mr. Citizen was naked in front of all of the spectators. After several moments of setting Mr. Citizen in the chemical agent which had pooled on the floor after the initial application, the officer picked up Mr. Citizen like a piece of luggage by his arms and legs, then carried him to a nearby detaining cell where he would only have toilet water to wash off the chemical agents which are oil based and already soaked into the pores of the skin. Bystanders were heard saying things such as: “I can’t believe the amount of excessive Force used against one man!” and “It was nothing short of rape! Gang rape! Pure inhumanity!”  

My friend, does anything change just because I change the name Mr. Joe Citizen to inmate/prisoner/convict Joe Jones? For many people it does within their own minds. Just a change in the name is enough for people to accept this violation of humanity to be imposed on the guys here on Death Row! I know this to be fact because it happens here on a regular basis. I’ve experienced it first hand and witnessed it even more.  

This and many other reasons is why we protest. It’s not about us here trying to directly demand anything from TDCJ officials, because we already know the outcome of that situation/scenario. It’s been done before in vain. I recently read an article in a newspaper which spoke about the last hunger strike in October ’06, where a spokesperson for TDCJ stated that no formal demands/complaints were submitted in conjunction with the hunger strike. It reminds me of that song that says: “You’re so vain! You probably think this song is about you... don’t you?” My friend, this is all about us sacrificing what little we have just too simply have a voice to speak to you. To get your attention and show you that we’re willing to do what it takes to bring our cause to the front and achieve our goals! You are the power who has the ability to directly make changes with your actions and words. However, if its formal demands they want they’ll get it! We have to realize that while we let all manner of distractions separate us – the state is killing more humans. Daddies, husbands, brothers and friends are dying! Humans! Dead! All killed while we play ego/pride games! 

In conclusion, I would like to encourage you to get in touch and get involved with us on a deeper and more personal level. This way you will know what’s going on with us. Most people don’t even know there were over 10 people who engaged in the last hunger strike. My greatest applaud for Mr. Larry Estrada who went at least 40 days (I bet most of you didn’t even know that). Mr Estrada is who I want to be when I grow up! A true activist by actions! As always, I greatly appreciate you taking the time to read this message (kind of long wasn’t it?) and remind you to feel compelled to buy a fancy dog shirt from http://drivemovement.org  

Take care of yourself and God Bless!

 

P.S. I've sent it out for Carlton to several activits-groups.

Circulated through, or placed with: 
TX-DeathPenalty-Info-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
ICADP newsletter- passing on to you the Italian translation of your article "Mulligan" which has just been posted.-Arianna Ballotta- ICADP, President
http://www.nodeathpenalty.net - Protest Update - 1st January by Kenneth Foster 2007 - Hungerstreik im Todestrakt in Texas

" Still Hungry "

Though it has been days since I've completed almost 2 weeks on "Hunger Strike" - I am still hungry! Hungry for Justice and Humanity.  

My hunger strike began on October 23, 2006 and ended on November 5, 2006. A few weeks before I started, a few other prisoners had launched their own strike and only a few remained from that group. That group had already inspired some of the other prisoners and when they found out that I was planning to begin one, a few more guys joined in. At one time we had about ten prisoners on hunger strike. Most of them couldn't hang on too long, but their efforts were still greatly appreciated! I cannot speak on their actions, so let me pass on my own experiences...  

Well. I believe that I began weighing 230 pounds (big guy!) but after 3 days of not eating they finally weighed me at 224 pounds. I consistently lost about 1 1/2 to 2 pounds a day. On my last day I weighed 210 pounds. They made the whole process of being monitored as inconvenient as possible. Most of the time they woke me up at about two o'clock in the morning to escort me to the medical building. The earliest they ever came was eleven o'clock in the evening. So, I was being deprived of the little sleep I was able to get. Some of you may think, "You're in your cell 24 hours a day - you can sleep anytime you want to!" but this is better said than done. During the daytime hours there's plenty of unnecessary noise and claver going on. Guards opening and slamming doors; guards yelling; prisoners yelling; prisoners kicking doors because the guards are ignoring them; mentally feeble prisoners yelling and babbling; general conversations competing with the noise which becomes ever-present white noise; officials walking around with their walkie-talkies turned all the way up (a pretentious sign of importance). All of these things and personal ventures keep us awake and the only semi-quiet comes in between the hours of eleven o'clock at night and 3 o'clock in the morning, and that's only if the mentally feeble don't get rifted up (because one feeds off the other and soon they're all agitated). I can't say that it's easy trying to sleep on an empty stomach to begin with. While the escort guards brought me to the medical building they would speak down on the protest and try to convince us to quit. They said things like, "Nobody cares anyway. All you're doing is hurting yourself for nothing. Nothing we will ever change. Some of you deserve to die". I did my best to be polite. Not because I'm a better person or that’s how I am, but because nothing pisses them off more than not being able to touch me, to anger me and lose control of my thoughts and/or dignity. At the medical building they put me on the scale and then sat me on a chair to get my blood pressure. After that they escorted me to my cell and gave me a cup to urinate in. They have a test for the urine to detect calories to make sure I had not gotten nourishment elsewhere. The test also monitors the condition of the kidneys. After a long time without food, the first thing that fails us is the kidneys. When that happens they have to give medical attention and force-feed the prisoner at the hospital. After the urine test they escorted me back to my cell.  

Let me briefly explain the conditions I faced in my cell at the time... For the last month and a half it has been cold. On top of that, the TDCJ officials have refused to turn off the cold air conditioner. It just so happens that the section I live on is the coldest due to our strong air ducts. After 2 weeks of intense cold they decided to hand out wool blankets which are only good if you're 5 feet tall (short). Then, 2 weeks after that they finally passed out dingy jackets. Only after the jackets were passed out could I venture from my bed's blankets. So, for most of the hunger strike I only had the option of sleeping or thinking. On about the fifth day of not eating all I could think about was food! In my mind, I must have visited every restaurant and grocery store I’ve ever been to at least 5 times a day. Driving it out of my mind only caused more hunger, because all I could think about is the hunger itself. At least thinking about the minor details of food like spices to use, how to cook, variants on the recipe, etc... could be distracting for a moment. Yet, only for a moment! The cold made it worse. To this very day it is cold and officials refuse to turn off the cold air conditioner and turn on the heat! Even the guards are walking around here with heavy coats on. What's even more of an insult is that the guards are using a personal space heater in the control room which can be seen from my cell. When I look out of my door I see the glowing coils of their heater and about 3 guards huddled in their jackets. Tell me that isn't psychological warfare! Hilarious! Even as I write this at about midnight, the guards just slammed a window in the control room to keep in the hot air! Tell me that isn't coincidence.  

What really surprised me was that my pain only got worse when I decided to eat. Before, I was just hungry, but when I began eating I was ravenous! I ate (and continued to eat) anything edible. For the first few days I would hurt from eating. It felt like the food was tearing my stomach open and most of it got stuck at the top of my stomach. For hours I'd feel sick like I had eaten too much and felt like vomiting. Yet, I still felt ravenous. My muscles had atrophied (gotten weaker) a little and my head would spin when I stood up. I can't measure how much my mental health was drained, but I was very uncomfortable in any situation which involved thought. It was like my mind just wouldn't work and I was unsure of the products it did struggle out. It's not a great feeling not being able to trust your own decisions. This was the longest I've ever gone without food in my life up until now. It wasn't something I'm fond of (at 200 pounds plus I shouldn't have to mention that I love food), but it was something that had to be done due to the message I feel is important to emphasize. Which is this...  

My friends, we must begin doing all that we can do to abolish the Death Penalty! Not only what we're willing to do. Doing all that we can do is what needs to be done to achieve our goal. Our goal is to abolish the Death Penalty and that goal is a goal in the struggle for mankind itself to achieve a humane civilization. Humanity is not a part of this state. State of Texas Criminal Justice and/or State of Barbaric/Savage Mind I concede that it must start with prisoners of the Death Row to change the abolishment issue from a political view to argue about at the dinner table and make it into an active movement. A movement which ultimately expresses the state of our civilization’s humanity by how it deals with the problem. Don't misunderstand me, because the efforts thus for by the abolitionist have been appreciated, but please recognize that what has been done is not enough. What is being done is not affecting change. The Death Penalty Abolition has sadly become a movement of pageantry. Something that politicians have come to expect and master. They have found simple ways of nullifying and undermining a mass of protestors standing around holding signs. What is that doing for us? I would suggest that marching and standing in front of government buildings stop! Yes! Stop! Cease and desist. How about gathering petitions and grievances, then marching into these government buildings and presenting them to state representatives: Senators, Legislature, Governor, etc... Attend hearings and protest in front of the public. How about getting involved with the Death Row prisoners who are reaching out to you. Not as casual pen-pals, but as a person looking to affect change! The DRIVE Movement has reached out to many Death Penalty Abolitionist groups and only a couple have even expressed interest in working with them - much less coming to visit and making solid commitments to do what it takes. Though many have ideas on what it will take very few have activated these plans. I have personally had many people tell me that they don’t believe that actions by the prisoners will make things change and for the record, I agree with you to an extent! We did not believe that just because we went on hunger strike that anything would change as a direct result. Our purpose was to reach out to the public by raising our voices in protest. Radio stations and newspapers caught wind of the hunger strike and gave us a platform on which to speak. Some media bent the story to make it negative and some did what a journalist are supposed to do and reported the activity without false sensationalism - one way or another. These voices were projected to reach out to those who can directly do something to change this travesty. we are showing the passion and intensity that's necessary to make a difference. We don't have much (at least I don’t) and we are willing to sacrifice what little we have to do what we can do to protest. Why? Because that’s what must be done!

Finally, in another attempt to show the incompetence/ignorance/arrogance of TDCJ officials, let me give a brief account of the night October 28th, 2006. This was my fifth night without food and the whole unit was on lock-down. They were still doing shake-downs late at night while I asked the ranking officials on duty (sargents) if they were going to take me to get weighed and urine tested. First, they tried to lie and said that we're only supposed to get weighed every 3 days. I knew beyond all doubt that this was another one of their lies told with that same arrogant condescending face which looks at you like you're the dumbest idiot on the planet. Nevermind why they're trying to shake me down at midnight! I refuse to come out for shake-down. Now the Lieutenant comes with a whole different story. He verifies that we are supposed to get weighed after missing nine meals and then every 24 hours after that. Thus, proving his Sargent a liar (names not used because I'm not trying to make these arrogant swine famous on my shift.) Anyways, he tells me that I haven't went nine meals without eating which I proved to be false by having him call the medical building and ask if they had weighed and urine tested me, the night before and they confirmed it. However, the Lieutenant takes it upon himself to say that they had made a mistake on the other shift card. What he didn't realize is that everyone knew we were on hunger strike. Not only did I place it on several web-sites, but the day I started – several other prisoners started and I refused to take my arm out of the feeding slot until ranking officials knew that I was on a hunger strike. So, since it's come down to my word, I suggest that we solve the whole problem and just have them take me to get weighed and the urine test will prove that I haven't eaten and while I'm gone they could shake-down my property. Problem solved, right? Wrong! This idiot shows his total lack of problem solving skills by threatening me, thus creating a bigger problem. He tells me that either I cooperate or he'll gas me and take me out. By this time I'm pissed. I tell him, "Do what you gotta do! Bitch c'mon with the gas!" Long story short – they got lucky and grabbed the curtain (sheet) I was using to deflect the gas, so I came out. I’m not willing to sacrifice myself to having that gas sprayed directly on me again unless it's completely necessary. Though, I do have this disciplinary case to present as evidence. It proves the time and date. I hope you are all getting this. This was just one of their arrogant attempts to undermine our protest! However, this time I'm going to give everyone ample warning - on January 1, 2007 we will engage in another hunger strike. This time, they can try to say we're eating all they want, but when my kidney fails and I'm laying in the hospital - that will be proof enough! What will you do? Are you hungry? I'm still hungry!  

Carlton A. Turner, November 2006

"Food for Thought (Eat This)"
by: Carlton A. Turner

Greetings! Allow me to be brief in expressing what I intend on addressing...

On the date of October 23rd, 2006, I am initiating a
'Hunger Strike.' This will be done with the intentions of protesting the Death Penalty and the horrid conditions that Death Row prisoners endure daily. Sadly, I cannot predict when this hunger Strike will end, but I intend to push it to the limit of my will. I refuse to eat any more garbage that TDCJ feeds here. I'm tired of accepting spoiled and undercooked food. I'm tired of the deprivation. Change must come! Protesting in many Forms is my way of speaking out and standing up for Justice and Truth.

"We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that amongst these are LIFE, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness. - That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed. - That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it...."
- excerpt from "The Declaration of Independence"

How long will you let them to continue to destroy and pervert American ideals? The time for talking has passed. Time for action! We've been passive for way too long. Act now! I implore you to help us!

 

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By Carlton A. Turner 

October 22, 2006

catReallyIsthatSo.pdf

"Really? Is That So?"  

Sad! Sad! Sad! I sat here shaking my head with derision as I reflected on the pure disgrace of TDCJ’s arrogance. It reminded me of the military junta in Burma who had become so arrogant in their tyrannical dictatorship that they actually believed that the very people the oppressed had grown to Love them. An arrogance so idiotic that they implemented elections against Mrs. Aung Sann Suu Kyi who is the daughter of the assassinated general Aung San who is revered as the father of Burmese independence. Needless to say, the junta lost the election, but as with any arrogant dictator they refused to recognize the results of the election and continue to oppress the people of Burma to this very day. TDCJ officials maintain this level of arrogance, because no matter how much the prisoners prove cases of civil rights violations, corruption, and/or deprivation/neglect – they continue to apply these oppressive and inhumane methods. The word ‘sadistic’ comes to mind when I think about TDCJ and its officials.  

It’s sad how blatant these violations are what’s even worse is the courts and society’s inability to abolish these terms of intense oppression and abuse. However, in the light of due process, I will take the time to highlight these torments which are self-evident. I will bring forth allegations and at any opportunity possible I will also have evidence from their own machinations. Seems an unlikely goal, doesn’t it? Well, TDCJ is so arrogant that it will provide the information which would condemn itself in any eye of Justice! Why? Why not?! It hasn’t stopped this travesty yet! Any attempt at reform has only led to worse conditions. The stigma of Death Row has only been used as an excuse to treat us worse! My purpose in presenting these fallacies in the system is not to vent my frustrations, but to give examples of why I must protest in a certain way in which I fell will attain a change. A change of path from injustice to prosperity. From subjugation to security. Sadly, our sadistic overseers see subjugation as security, but the malice that subjugation breeds always erupts into a volatile outburst called revolution 

My first example will be simple. This is to display TDCJ’s inability to be consistent and lack of moral compass or measure. This leads to injustice due to arrogances turpitude…  

At the beginning of September, I found myself in a situation where I was compelled to spit in the face of a TDCJ employee. For a more detailed description of that encounter, please reference an earlier article titled: “Inception”. I was given a disciplinary case for this impudent act born from my righteous rage! I was run through the mockery of a discipline court and given 15 days of cell restriction.  At the beginning of October I was given a minor disciplinary case for refusing to comply with grooming standards by refusing to shave. An event so minuscule that it didn’t warrant an article. Again, I was run through the mediocre system of kangaroo court. This time I was given 15 days recreation restriction and 15 days commissary restriction…  

It’s truly sad that I feel as there are those who do not immediately grasp the imbalance of fairness here. So, let me explain… I spit on a guard! That is an assault! Pure disrespect of a TDCJ employee and disregard for the rules and policy in the highest form. A major offense which I was given a lesser punishment than for harmless minor case by 50%. So, should that encourage me to spit on guards? Apparently, my facial hair is more offensive than assaulting a guard! As proof, I am posting the disciplinary reports so that it’s not seen as a hollow allegation. I’d like to think this proof as irrefutable. However, I plan on continuing to present more evidence. 

Get ready for a long journey!

 

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Contumacious Legacy"

October 22, 2006

Due to the sensitive nature of the subject at hand, I apologize in advance if it seems as if I'm divulging information better kept quiet. However, realize that I am only speaking on these terms with only intentions of expressing my perspective of the Truth to attain positive change. My goal is to give a brief history of protest on Death Row as it relates to my personal motivation/ inspiration. Most of the time I do my best to speak on personal experience as it is sort of an insult to speak on the affairs of others because of the constant exploitation imposed upon Death Row prisoners. Plus, many times what's seen from the outside is truly backwards on the inside because of intentions. I ask that you read this without having to question my integrity or intentions.

I begin with a personal proclamation: I, Carlton A. Turner, support the DRIVE Movement by individual choice ... Yet, this doesn't mean that I am an active participant in the Movement (Death Row Inner-communalist Vanguard Engagement) exclusively. The DRIVE Movement is in a phase of non-violent protest and has its own evolution process that is best not disturbed by the virtue of an individual, but only by the will of all people involved. I doubt that the participants of DRIVE have planned an organization of phases, but from what I see DRIVE has the intentions of making changes and potential to foment revolution. Therefore, with that motivation it is apparent to me that the movement is transmutable, because I know that more radical tactics are necessary. Yet, I am enlightened to the fact that there is a process of Justice which requires peaceful resistance (gandhism). My actions and tactics do not reflect this process due to my personal history with the TDCJ officials and in recognition of the level of intensity that is truly needed to draw the attention of the proper officials. In simple terms: I know that they only understand chaos and madness. Filing legal documents and grievances are a part of their inept system and are easily ignored and suppressed. Yet, they are necessary to establish the fact that peaceful resolve was sought and to prove that the legal process is ineffective in achieving its means. I have been through this part of the struggle already and activate radical tactics. So, in the light of protecting the constitution of DRIVE, I have to respectfully keep a distance until the movement reaches a phase which corresponds with all of my actions. Then, I can declare myself a DRIVE participant and not just a supporter. We work towards the same goals and therefore I do not feel left out. I’m sure many who read this will find it sort of counter-productive that I do not throw in my full participation, but let me explain the events that led to my understanding which gave birth to my level of involvement.

Since we’ve been on this oppressive unit of sensory deprivation there have been many transient uprisings by various people (groups and solitary). At one time there was a lot of corruption within the internal structure and hierarchy of TDCJ that was so intense that it was necessary to show solidarity and fight to maintain any semblance of humanity and the respect any man expects. Guards were gratuitously slamming prisoners on their faces while they were handcuffed and helpless. Prisoners were being deprived of their food, recreation, necessities, and overall dignity. This was all due to sadistic fun. Had not these fellas stood up to this treatment with strong determination and endured the pains of prison warfare, all Death Row would be subject to this abuse at this very moment without question. Though these things still happen from time to time, it is quickly rectified internally by firing or transferring the guard. I have been in the middle of one of these controversies and it is one of the examples how TDCJ cannot resolve problems peacefully.

In April of 2003 I resided on the restriction pod by choice. I’ve always found the restriction pod as it retains a certain level of freedom, because there’s not much else they can take away from a prisoner and if he can survive without the so-called privileges TDCJ offers, he can endure years of restriction. For us here, there is no incentive, because we are granted no privilege of worth. Therefore, I choose to stay on the restrictive pod. Plus, it is a bonus that I am surrounded by other prisoners that do not bow down to harassment or fear the loss of privileges.

At that point in time there were remnants of guards who abused and tortured prisoners. These were those who were smart enough to persevere and join together in a “Good Ol’ Boy” system where they looked out for the well-being and best interest of each other. I will not speak on their criminal activities, because there are prisoners who colluded with these unsavory characters. Prisoners who hold personal virtue over civil rights. I do not seek to tread upon anyone, but encourage these same men to start caring and get involved with positivity regardless of past actions. Your tenacity is needed elsewhere! The “Good Ol’ Boy” system comprised of many blatant and latent racists. Many times I had overheard these guards call prisoners: niggers, spics, wetbacks, etc…. At the time I just kept my mouth shut, because so many prisoners weren’t willing to stand up for themselves and in prison people (guards and prisoners) see it as stupidity to get involved in affairs which do not effect your own situation. Yet, the way I see it – if I (or anyone else) just let them get away with abuse and racism with anybody – then they’ll eventually come try the same thing on me. Therefore, stop it before it starts to spread!

One day I decided that enough was enough. I was standing at my cell door and overheard an officer call a prisoner a Wetback. So, I spoke up and got into a heated exchange of words with the guard. It just so happens that the same guard would have to escort me to the shower less than an hour later. Long story shot – I was slammed and punched in the head repeatedly. Would you believe that I’m the one that got written a disciplinary for assault? True! I decided to fight back instead of accepting this abuse. So, that night they came to move me to a security risk cell, I refused to move. I was heavily gassed and a 5-man riot team was used to extract me. Yet, I fought and stabbed 2 guards on the riot team with a plastic spoon handle and pork chip bone. My goal was to prove that I was not helpless and am willing to seriously hurt guards to protect myself. They eventually got me into the security cell, but the next morning I went to recreation and refused to leave. Another team was called and we fought. This time I threw one guard into some bars helmet first. They finally extracted me after a good fight. When I got back to my cell I ate my lunch and refused to relinquish my tray. I was ready to fight again, but this time a swarm of officials were sent to investigate the problem. Only after fighting and causing disruption was I given the opportunity to be heard by a serious official. I made demands. Demands were met immediately. The overall attitude towards me changed. Guards gave respect and courtesy. Anything I asked for (within reason) was provided. This courtesy resumed until most of the guards and officials around at the time either quit or transferred.

This same process has been implemented by many. Some do it when they see that too many new guards and officials are hired. It’s like a renewal. The problem is this: all of this effort is only used to attain that which should be granted to all prisoners. We have been selfish! There have been times where it was discussed that we should all come together and coordinate our efforts, but ego trips and philosophical differences get in the way. Most of the time it has been insecurity that nobody wants to be a follower and too many people want to be leaders. Then, there are those who fear the intentions of the virtue of the next man. Everyone worries about who will gain the most power/influence in the end. All just ego trips! Sometimes it came to a point where it was like city that planned a day where everyone would yell and make the biggest noise ever – only to have everyone fall in silence because they wanted to behold this event. Yet, they heard things they never heard before. The wind’s wisps, birds singing, dogs barking, etc… Many times we are not willing to make the efforts for others who will also benefit from our work. On top of all this, so many individuals have had so-called unforgivable arguments. Some belong to a collective and the malice spreads. This is a simple inability to get along. All of this is not so huge that we can’t overcome it. We just need to make the effort.

During these attempts of agglomeration I have personally let it be known that I am willing to participate. Sometimes I fell out due to my own ego trips, so I am guilty too. There were so many fake starts that I kind of gave up and quit even considering invitations. However, I did let it be known that if I was shown a true and earnest effort to mobilize, I would throw in my hat. Meanwhile, I had other duties to address with my Peoples. Plus, I still have to find a way to survive. While I ruminated on personal issues, I kept an ear out for any efforts. It seems the same individuals were doing what they’ve been doing. I highly commend these people who continue to shove lawsuits and grievances down their gullets (Roy Pippin, Hank Skinner, Tyrone Trottie, and Billy Mason just to name a few). Sadly, many of the men who risked harm by physically resisting have been murdered by the state. Richard Cartwright, Bobby Hopkins, Tommie Hughes, Gerald Tigner, Lonnie Pursley, Todd Willingham, Ponchai Wilkinson are just a few who died with the honors of a warrior. Countless others influenced us all toward human consciousness and education to enable us to fight: Justin Fuller, Frederick McWilliams, Farley Matchett, Hasan Shakur and James Allrigde are a few who touched us with these positive vibes. A few continue to influence the collective mind of Death Row with proactive thought and positive actions. Many think me to be arrogant, but I am always humbled in the shadow of these men’s spirit and accomplishments. They have surely ascended! I am disheartened to see the absence of some powerful and influential men who are still alive while the fight ensues. I only hope that they soon feel the pull of the call.

About a year and a half ago I began hearing of DRIVE. First it was just a rumor I was hearing of something a few guys had in mind to activate. This wasn’t the first time I’ve heard of a group of guys trying to do something. Mostly they disperse because they didn’t feel like they had enough participants or supporters. For some reason the collective conscience believes that only a huge mass of us can make a change – which is true on a certain level, but it has to start somewhere and with someone. So, since they can’t get everybody to participate – they give up! However, I kept hearing more and was handed the DRIVE Handbook in its original form. Me and another prisoner discussed the whole matter and I said that I could support something like DRIVE if it was serious. As time went by I began hearing of several protests and more people got involved. Though they are non-violent protest, I saw how it began to affect the prison. Change had begun.

I sought out the key participants of DRIVE to get more information to pass on to associates of mine who tend to support anything I get involved in. We wanted to make sure that the movement was of pure intentions to achieve goals and not just to cause mischief. We also needed to be sure that the product and work was the will of the community and not the will of a few. The movement also needed the ability to adapt to its situation. Meaning: when it was time to implement more intense measures – we wouldn’t be limited to few actions. Neither could it be linked to one person as a leader. Everything must be amenable. It met these criteria and many more. In this, I was able to support it. However, I have my own way of fighting. I seek change by the methods. I know to work with potency. I know that DRIVE will have to eventually step up to this level of intensity. Hopefully, by then I will have forged a path that will contribute to the swift advancement of DRIVE. Until then, I lean to the Left on my Cane of Strength. The Golden Path I read is rough and I may not live to enjoy the temporal reward, but to fight for Love, Truth, Peace, Freedom, and Justice is to invoke the reward of the sublime and empyreal. I ask for action towards fruition. I don't prescribe specific action. I just ask that you do something ... anything!

 

D.R.I.V.E. Movement  Logo:   drawn by Carlton A. Turner

StatusQuoByCAT[1].jpg (267964 Byte)"Status Quo" By Carlton Turner, 2006

StatusQuoByCAT2.jpg (179349 Byte)

 

 

 

"Not a Sporting Chance"  

By Carlton Turner

October 7, 2006

I’m sure this has been pontificated before, but I find it highly disturbing that Life & Death decisions are allocated in the manner of a sport within buildings called ‘Courts’. You have many variants of ‘Courts’: basketball court, tennis court, racquetball court, etc… All of which are games! Why then do we not see Criminal Justice Courts in the same ilk? People, there is no difference! The Criminal Justice Courts are the playgrounds of pretentious children who cannot attain righteousness, so they work to mold the law into their own vision of piety. They see the law as something flexible. Something that they are ordained to interpret as they will. The value of this brand of judgement is nugatory. Surely, this is the Justice of Criminals!  

The very core of these courts corrupt the process of Justice. The promotion system inherently breeds corruption. Most individuals (keyword: ‘most’) work to make a living and the only thing that separates the people of the Court from the rest of society is the level of education and tenacity they hold. Not to say that they retain intelligence and persistence supreme, but it requires a certain quality to survive in their profession. A quality which borders upon flagitious greed. Avarice mentalities place their own needs and wants above any other virtue. True Justice suffers because instead of Justice being sought, it is actually convictions being sought at the least cost of these Courts. The fallacy of this process manifests itself in many ways. Here are just a few. ... 

Let’s say that you’ve committed a crime which has been obvious of your doing and you’ve been introduced into the Court system. Rather than taking you through a trial of your peers/jury and using the resources of the Court to achieve a just rendering of your crime – the prosecutors will opt to have you plead guilty of a lesser charge. So, they’re either acting in collusion with the criminal to escape the consequences appropriate to his actions or the indictment brought forth was trumped up to intimidate the said offender. Too often deals between lawyers/public defenders and prosecutors are made over lunches and rounds of golf. A prosecutor would rather ‘plea out’ a case where it would be tough to prove in trial and attain a conviction. A lawyer may rather ‘plea out’ a case which he knows he can’t win. So, they capitulate and compromise. The prosecutor’s goal is to get sure convictions into the Courts for trial and other convictions without spending the money and time on trials they aren’t sure of winning. The lawyer does his best to stay away from trial defeats and look out for the well-being and needs of the clients which can provide monetary compensation for their efforts. Monetary compensation which undoubtedly reaches the hands of prosecutors and judges! Woe to the client without monetary compensation!  Woe to the innocent! For guilt or innocence is not a consideration. Only stratification and money!  

That brings up another example… If I am impecunious/indigent/broke, than I cannot afford a lawyer that has my best interests in mind. Therefore, I know that this Court-appointed lawyer I have been given is not going to do all he can and in many cases he’s not even capable. Most of these lawyers have an abundance of Court-appointed cases and have not any time to dedicate to your protection of rights to due process. With this knowledge I know that winning in Court is slim regardless of guilt or innocence. The prosecutor also knows this and instead of seeking Justice, he will seek the best decision that will advance his career and financial situation. This is completely rapacious and acrimonious! The only choice is to buy a lawyer and his favors; ‘plea out’ for lesser charges; or take your case to trial and get completely raped and beleaguered! This is not Justice! This is depredation! As you see, it’s endogenous. 

My last example is the odious Death Penalty. It’s ironic to me that most supporters of the DP claim to be good Christians. Why is it so hard for them to realize that the Messiah himself was given the DP? While we’ve advanced technologically, we still practice rites of brutes/savages/barbarians. How many more innocent people must die? Is it worth killing innocent people to kill the guilty? For what purpose do we feel the need to kill the guilty? To punish them? Death is for all that live! How is that a punishment? The only people who are punished are the family and loved ones of the executed/murdered. This execution has actually sent the executed to heaven – if we were to count Christianity, Islam, Judaism, etc… as Truths/reality – because many men who have lain on the gurney for their murder are converts to religion whether you doubt their devotion or not. Surely, we do not delude ourselves into believing the DP as a deterrent! If we, as sagacious scholars, accept this – then mankind is truly at an apex in the Dark Ages… Did you just think, “It’s to pay the price…” What an emetic thought! When you pay for something you are replacing the value of one thing for another and the juxtaposition of the value of lives is to compare the smell of oranges to the taste of cotton. Each life is nonpareil! Beyond price!  

This is the askance nature of the Courts. They use the rules of games to allocate so-called Justice! Have you heard of the ‘3-strike law’? My crowning point is this: if this much corruption is the tip of the iceberg and the roof of Criminal Justice – how could you support and not fight against their control of the application of the Death Penalty process which is a fallacious entity to begin with? How? I believe it’s way past time to take this fatal and deleterious game from these impious children and declare – GAME OVER!

 

"My Most Humble Apologies"

10-5-06

This is dedicated to the illuminated readers of my infrequement neurotic nostrum known as „Rant & Raves". Sadly, our time was exiguous, but situation change. To ignore the importunate need in conflict enveloping my Self would be a pernicious travesty. For these few years I've strove to maintain the path of art /literature without clouding my expressions with "Death Row" antics. Yes, my environment does contribute to the mentality which bleeds into my artistic expression, but much of the material lay document from before my arrest. I had hoped to write more books and accomplish bounds in artwork, and I truly wish for that to unfold, but as a spectator of reality on this plane of existence I must see things as they are and not what I wish them to be. With that much expounded, I must explain why these aspirations may be snuffed.

Recently, I have been forced by my own conscience to recognize the ignominious ways of the system here in Texas which perpetuates this insouciant killing machine. A system so arrogant that it uses on oxymoron as a title- " Criminal Justice"!  Yet, it may be more appropriate as I think about it ... Yes, yes, yes ... the Justice of Criminals! Criminals allocating Justice! How assuring does that fit you, my friends? Anyways from here on out, I will do my best to get examples of this mockery of Justice. I will explain the dynamics of this system which extends its reach into the very bowels of this dungeon with its execrable corruption. Maybe this will lead to your understanding and you may find it a worthy cause to invest time and effort into.

The problems have always been there, but I have to be Truthful and admit to my own callous dissociative and anti-social behavior. Throughout the history of Death Row on the maximum security Polunsky unit, most prisoners have held invidious and malignant attitudes towards each other. Words and actions have been used that are inexpiable. Everybody has disrespectful things to say about one another. This leads to an ambient tension which is so thick you could cut it with a butter knife. This dichotomy has led to a negative charged environment that I did my best to avoid. Yet, time and time again I felt myself drawn into a pit webbed with gossip and canard. It got to the point where I felt that must remove my Self from any contact with this cycle of antipathy. Though, I may now see a deleterious consequence, but it did help to develop some crucial elements of Self. This nescience on my part only contributed to the hate that comminutes us. However, I was able to stay offload just enough to maintain a semblance of friendship with a select few. Individuals I felt were Truthful and that I could appertain to. Within them I had placed my social development. These few men were those who keep me grounded as I aspired to new heights in my Self edification. Most of these few men are now dead.

Each time one of these associates has been led to the gurney to be murdered - a part of my Self left with them. At first, it angered me and left me in lugubrious repose. Time granted memories and thoughts. Cogitation granted a link to the situation at hand. Here lately, it came to a head as they murdered a highly associate by the name of Justin Fuller and another acquaintance sat in wait of his own Death. Knowing the kind of man Justin Fuller was and the attributes we shared raised my awareness to its apex. This enlightenment has given me the strength and wisdom to see that must dedicate the rest of my days fighting against the wrongs perpetrated against us. I am not the type of person to do a job halfway to make time for other endeavours. Therefore, I must use any and all outlets available.

So, I must apologize to those who have come to enjoy my erudite blather and hope that you can appreciate the struggle I face. I urge to join me and support my efforts on this path of resistance. I'm not being obsequious, because if you are as disappointed as I am, then I know you'd demand an apology. You are worthy of this honor.

I still hope enstill the essence of my spirit in future Rants & Raves.

Thank you for your time and patience!

Sincerely,

Carlton A. Turner

 

 

„INCEPTION“

My kindest regards to you, reader! I would like to begin by saying that it is my opinion that most aggressive action by the prisoners on Death Row in Texas roots in the inability to tolerate the horrid treatment and constant disrespect of common human courtesy. Stray dogs are given more consideration on a daily basis. I can guarantee you that even with this vagabond animal - if you mistreat, harass, and/or torment it enough - it will surely bite back!

So, with that much said, I begin the account of the recent events of September 7th 2006.

September 7th was not a day of infamy, but it was the day I decided that I was that I was through enduring the blatant disrespect imposed upon Death Row prisoners everyday. Early in the morning I packed up all of my property and left it in the corner of my cell as I made my way to the dayroom for my 2 hour so-called 'recreation' in another cage. I already knew that I was going to level 3 - somehow/ some way! The original plan was to protest by occupying the dayroom/cage until they extracted me by force. As we all know - plans change!

It just so happens that about 30 minutes into my 'recreation' time, an officer from the 'Gang Intelligence' (GI) arrives on the pod and walks onto the section I'm occupying and proceeds to tear through another prisoner's property while the prisoner is out at recreation. I could not contain myself any longer and screamed, "That's exactly what I'm talking about! Years of pure disrespect!" Then, I shouted to the GI officer to get out of the prisoner's cell, because by then it had been about 30 minutes since he began his so-called 'search': About 15 minutes after that finally concludes his 'search' and exits the prisoner's cell. As he does so, I ask him, "Why do you have to keep harassing and disrespecting us like that?" and he replies, „That what I do ..." with the most condescending tone imaginable! I swear I would have slapped his teeth into his throat if I could reach him, but instead I spit on him! He stops walking and faces me and unwisely tries to threaten me, „You’re going to pay for that! “and right when he gets to, „pay for „I spit in his face, gave him the middle finger, and said, "F... you swine!" Hell, you can't do anything but walk away after that! So, that's what we both did. He went to cry to the rank and I went to start a fire in front of the dayroom door so that the extraction team would have no traction on the wet floor, because they would have to put out the fire with water. I'd like to take this quick moment to point out the coincidence or irony (whichever is more convenient for you) that this encounter manifests on the day I decide to protest and fight back! Surely, it was meant to be!

As the officers working the pod put out the fire, the rank came on the pod. They tell me to come out of the dayroom, but I refuse. I explain that they were going to have to deal with me anyway, but the GI put himself in the line of fire and what he did was a perfect example of why I have to protest. I also explained that the goal in general is to do something that warrants my level to be downgraded to level 3 in protest. Therefore, at that point I've already reached my goal, but now I’m pushing it to the limit to emphasize the point that I'm protesting. So, at this point, I've got the cake, icing, and the fancy decorations, but later I was to choke on my delicacy. Maybe I made it too rich and underestimated its sweetness!

The rank left after they seen that I wasn't coming out and one of them stops and says with his most condescending voice, "Stay down then." Which translates in my mind, „Stay in there so we can hurt you, ni....! There's nothing I'd like to do more ...." At that point I entertained the thought of coming out of the dayroom, but my mind and plan was set even though it played into their desire to harm me. Yet, had I come out without witnesses (camera, nurses, etc....), they would have the chance to rough me up. So,  I waited as they went to get their extraction team.

Hopefully, nearby there is a clear and true description of the extraction process; because I'm not here to explain that, but I do want to speak on the significant part of my recent experience ... I'm not new to being sprayed with gas. I fought this oppression since 13 years old with my A.II.V.L.N compatriots. However, when I expected them to spray sugar gas - they sprayed pure hell onto me from head to toe. All I had on was a pair of boxers. They sprayed it so thick that it dripped of me like syrupy acid. The old gas they used to use was bad enough. It would heat up and take away your breath. This new gas was similar - excerpt, where the old gas would get hot and level off at a constant temperature - the new gas does nothing but get hotter to the point that it felt like I was in a furnace. The old gas would choke you, but the new gas impedes any breathing. Imagine being drowned in lava and that's what you have here. I am not exaggerating in any way, whatsoever! It burned to the point where it effected me in all aspects - physically, mentally, and spiritually. First, there was the physical burn of the skin. Second, after losing my breath. I could no longer think property. Lastly, the pain of fire from head to toe made me realize what it truly meant to burn in hell, because just when I thought I would get used to the heat - it got hotter. At least with real fire it'll burn your nerves away and kill you and it's over. With this new gas, the burning persists for hours upon hours. Needless to say, I came out even though I had every intentions of fighting. They threw me in a cell on level 3 and told me to wash the gas off with water in the toilet. My friend, it doesn't come off immediately! It burrows into the skin and after hours of bending over and standing up to wash off - your muscles start to give. Only after 8 concretive hours of pure hell did it finally let up, but for 2 days the sensitive parts of my body burnt. I had to keep checking to make sure they weren’t really on fire. Even on the third and fourth day I was still wiping of gas. Officers passing by would start coughing. I wasn't given a shower until the second day. Yes, even after the showers I was still burning.

So, though in the end I got caught with hell - IT WAS WORTH IT! I choked on my cake, but it was a beautiful cake. They tried to break me, but will not submit! Written in huge black letters on the to of that cake is, "LOVE; TRUTH; PEACE; FREEDOM & JUSTICE!" ... and I shall eat of this cake - even if it chokes me to Death! Thank you for your precious time & patience, kind reader .....

 

October 2th, 2006 by Carlton A. Turner

 

I used to be pretty jealous of Jesus Christ! Yeah! Imagine that! I felt I had what it took to be the Messiah. I was still innocent and full of the potential. However, my father took it upon himself to exclude me from the running by breaking my leg at the age of 7 years old! DAMMIT! That totally screwed off the prophecy that not a bone could be broken. So, I guess you can say that I was a huge disappointment to myself at an early age. As I got older I turned my attention to possibly being the AntiChrist! Considering his glory, there's no way I could ever fill the shoes of such a great figure in history to come. So, I guess I'm stuck being a Gentleman as the rest of my friends. 9-1-05

Is there any possible way to screwing up my Life even more? I'm open for suggestions! E-mail me!  9-1-05

CarltonTurner@deathrow-texas.com

 

5-21-05

I've Lived this Life, so I really can't blame the world for having such flights of fancy. I mean... who could possibly resist the original combo in a society infatuated with 'extra value meals and/ or deals'? Grace, Forgiveness, and Salvation! all for the price of just one sacrifice! Well, dammit! supersize me! No, I can't blame the little bastards. However, it does tend to perturb me that they stubbornly refuse to relinquish and/or acknowledge their fables and fish stories for what they are. My People, one of the first signs of mental aberration is 'Delusions of Grandeur'. This universe becoming a damned quarantined sanatorium! Then they wonder why intelligent Life-forms don't want to interact with them! My beloved colleage, I can only implore the pagan saints that one day we will look back on it all and laugh... and if not- then I guess I'll be seeing all of you in hell! oh, well... pass the brimstone!

Thank you!    

 

9-9-05

Okay! Okay! I have a question... What happens when the Lord doesn't giveth? That's right! Leaves you out to dry! Your Soul just flapping in the wind. Holding on to that blind Faith! What will you do when He says, "NO!" ? Will you accept this denial? I mean, think about it .... What could be such a huge request from a miniscule creation as we have labelled ourselves, even though it is said in the Word that we are his greatest creation. Will you just go about your business... or will you seek the means to aquire what you seek?  Will you give your knees a rest and put your feet and hands to action... or better yet, will you pray to another power? The power which the Word says has its throne on this Earth? The one that has free reign on this Earth? The one that tempts you to live Life to your fullest potential? It's your decision... One last question before I retire to the recesses of dungeon- if I've not bored you yet... If you work to attain that which the Big Boss has denied you, how will you feel when he takes it away? He didn't giveth!!!! 

 

9-12-05

Don't you just Love this Earth? Really! Regardless of how you've been treating it. I Love it! The bird, trees, lions kangaroos, jaguars, and lizards of all kinds! Despite my misanthropic deeds, I love you fellow humans also! Do you also feel this way? Be honest! Yes? Well, answer me this: How can you get on your knees and show Love, admiration, honor glory and Faith in an entity which promises the destruction or our human race ( which is the only race I know) ? Spare a man and his ark, he's supposedly done it before and seeks to do it again. This entity does not propagate Life and his institutions have inspired the most horrendous acts in the world. Demanding blood-shed instead of tolerance. Death to you all if you do not worship the Death of his only son ( what was Adam?) !!!!! This is his own prophecy! The inspired Word of... Hmmm? Who? As these enviromentalist risk their own Lives to save rain forests and animals, you belch your righteousness! Those kooky people who stand in front of tractors in front to trees. Hugging those same trees. Showing true Love of what is and not of what might be. Trying to have Faith in those they see! Humanity! Yet, as they stand in front of your gun to protect this animal you hunt, they risk their own spark that is special as the next spark that lies behind it. Well, aren't you going to shoot him too? Trust me! God would?    

 

 

" Committed to the Fight for HumanRights"

" Dem Kampf um Menschenrechte gewidmet "

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